Two Thankful Months with Eloise Marie

Our Ellie is two months old, and she seems to change a grow with everyday. I love the big smiles and coos she gives us now, and though our lives are different, we can't think of having it any other way. We are so proud of her, and look forward to what this next month brings!

2 Months Old! 

Weight: 10 lbs. 13.5 oz.

Length: 24.5 inches

1. Eating? Ellie-girl nurses every 3-4 hours, and longer at night, so life has gotten easier in that way. 

2. Sleeping? She has been sleeping "through the night", or for six to nine hour stretches at night, for about 2 weeks now! Hooray! Much better sleep for me now too, which of course means a happier mom!

3. Milestones? Eloise is really looking at hands, and sometimes her feet, and has almost gotten her fingers in her mouth! Hooray! She is noticing a lot more in her surroundings, especially her mobile on her swing, and other toys attached to her carseat and bouncy chair. She is sticking her tongue out likes she thinks that will make her talk, and cooing so much more. She smiles all the time at us, which makes those frustrating times all worth it. What a sweetie! And she had her 2 month doctor's appointment, where our poor girl had to get 3 shots. They said everything is looking good, that we're doing a great job (YAY! Exactly what I needed!), and that she is in the 99th percentile on height! WOW!

4. Activities and adventures? Hmmm...Let's see! So many new things that she has experienced! We went on our first "road trip" to Grapevine Mills with my family to celebrate Mother's Day, and ate at Rainforest Cafe. She did really good, but got hot a few times so that made her fussy. She experienced her first tornado filled weeks with the devastating EF-5 in Moore, and now the one in El Reno. We are all so thankful that is over! We prepped to take cover at least 4 times, with the sirens blaring here in Norman, and almost went into our neighbor's rusty and water filled cellar, until we decided otherwise. Whew! We visited the Outlet Malls in Yukon for a little while, ate out several times, and of course more trips to Target. These past two weeks I said goodbye to my classroom at Norman High, and Ellie went with me several times to "help out" too. We hosted our first backyard party with Ellie here for our friend Brenda, who just retired from NHS. It was a great party for a great lady! We also helped move the Bassets to their new home in Edmond, and she slept pretty much the whole time! She went to her first Summer Breeze concert, and I look forward to taking her to many many more! And we also learned that she HATES the sound of a mooing cow. This is what her face does when we moo at her! 

And here are some pictures of the adventures we've experienced these past two weeks...

Retirement party for sweet Brenda!

Meeting some of her Nebraska "family" for the first time, Dick & Cheryl Hunt

Saying goodbye to my classroom...

Helping the Bassets move into their new home in Edmond!

I love these three! At our first Summer Breeze concert...Ahhh...

5. Favorite baby item? Her bouncy seat! It seems to be her new favorite thing too. She loves looking at the little owl and kicks, punches, and coos while she's in it. It's also been the only thing that works when she's been a bit fussy.  

6. Favorite moment these past two weeks? There have been so many small ones, all having to do with seeing her little personality start to shine. I love watching her play and look around in her swing and bouncy seat, and even in her carseat with her new bug toy. These moments are so fun to experience with her.

7. Looking forward to this next month? I'm looking forward to summertime and school being out, though I haven't worked since Spring Break. But it will be fun to be able to see many of my friends, since they're out of school too. YAY! ANNNND...Monsters University is coming out June 21st! Chris and I might just have to go relive our first date with some cheese sticks at IHOP. Or maybe we can do better than that now? Haha...

8. Visitors?: We haven't had many new visitors, but mostly those who have met her before! But those encounters are still just as special and sweet to us. She did get to meet some of my Nebraska "family", Dick and Cheryl Hunt. They came down to help Francesca move, and we got to spend a few evenings with them. 

9. One thing I've learned: That no matter how hard I try, sleeping longer in the mornings seems to be my favorite thing to do! If only I could motivate myself to get up after feeding Ellie in the morning! Argh! But it is fun too, especially if it involves snuggling with my girl.

10. My message to Ellie:

My big two month old girl! You are starting to get chubby and have a nice big belly like your parents. You smile so much at us now and we hear some coos from time to time. You do act like you have lots to say and are about to say it, but haven't quite figured out how that works. It's okay though! We love how you have discovered your hands and many of your other toys around you. You have almost sucked your thumb but not quite. We are keeping our fingers crossed! Throughout the day, you are awake a lot more too, which is fun to play with you! This also means longer sleeping at night, and that makes us very happy! You are so sweet, and so beautiful, and I can't believe that you are ours. You are everything we prayed for...dark hair, furry shoulders, very smiley, and so cute. You look like our baby and we are so proud that you are ours. With the devastation these past two weeks with the tornadoes and floods, it makes me even more grateful to have you, even when you are fussy. I can't imagine losing you, like so many mommas that have lost their babies. I can feel a big change in me in this way, because those sad stories make me cry now and make me want to hold you closer. I sure do love you, sweet girl, and hope you always know this!

Here are some of our favorites from these past two weeks...

Six Sweet Weeks with Ellie

We can't believe our girl is already 6 weeks old! She's growing each day, and we are loving watching her learn new things. Parenting is harder than we thought, but it is worth it when Ellie gives us one of her beautiful smiles. Her smiles start with her eyes, as they turn into half-moons, and her tiny mouth follows as it forms into the same shape. She gives us big toothless grins regularly now, and coos at us too. What a sweet girl! I don't want her to grow up, and I never realized how hard it would be as she reaches these milestones. It is exciting, and I catch myself saying, "I can't wait until she's old enough to...", but then I quickly retract my statement because this means she'll be growing up! I know I can't stop it, but I wish I could sometimes!

6 Weeks Old! 

Weight: 9 lbs. 8 oz.

Length: 23 inches

1. Eating? Ellie is nursing now about every 3-4 hours, and sometimes a bit longer at night! YAY! And I have saved more bags of milk, which I would have never imagined how proud I would be of them. Haha!

2. Sleeping? She is still sleeping in our room in a bassinet mostly, but I am hoping to make the full transition to her own crib in the next week or so. I love have her nearby though, and if I move her, it really means she's growing up! She consistently sleeps 3-4 hours at a time now, and I am thankful for that. She even slept 6 hours two nights in a row this week! YAY!

3. Milestones? These past two weeks we've had many firsts and new memories as our new little family of three. We had our first family dinner out together, just us, at Pei Wei. She also slept in her crib at night for the first time. To celebrate Ashley graduating from OU, we went out to eat and had to leave her for the first time too! But we were okay and so was she, since Uncle Darin came and watched her! A few other firsts this week were: a trip to Penn Square Mall, cupcakes from Cuppies & Joe, and hung outside in the garden while mom did some yardwork! Now she is wearing 0-3 month sized clothes, which makes me sad! And she smiles a lot more at us, and has even "talked" to us a few times! But our poor girl has also had a rough week or so with her baby acne, heat rash on her neck, and first diaper rash. She is hot natured like us so we are trying to keep her cool better.

4. Activities and adventures? We had two main events these past two weeks, and they were both last weekend. Auntie Ashley graduated from OU with her Bachelor's degree, so we went and watched her get her diploma! Hooray! We are so proud of her! We celebrated at Melting Pot, which is when Ellie stayed with Darin, and had a serious blowout all on his lap. Silly girl! It was my very first Mother's Day, and our moms allowed us to spend the day together doing what whatever we wanted! We had breakfast, hung out together, visited our Mimi and Lola anyway, and then had a picnic on OU's campus  under our favorite tree. It was a wonderful day that even ended with shakes from Sonic and snuggles on the couch! She also had her first trip to Guthrie to see one of Chris's cousins graduate high school. She did great there, and was so glad to meet everyone!

5. Favorite baby item this week? Hmmm... Probably her Swaddle Me sleep sacks! She's gotten to the place where she kicks so much at night that her blanket comes off or gets wrapped around her, so we tried this out this week. I think it has been part of the magic combo of getting her to sleep 6 hours in a row too, though it hasn't happened every night. 

6. Favorite moment these past two weeks? My first Mother's Day...The whole day was fun because I got to spend it with my two favorite people! 

7. Looking forward to these next two weeks? I'm looking forward to summertime and school being out, though I haven't worked since Spring Break. But it will be fun to be able to see many of my friends, since they'll out of school too. YAY! 

8. Visitors?: No new visitors this week, but got to see several people we love! We also made our first trips to Mimi's and Lola's houses on Mother's Day! And when we went to Guthrie for Stasjha's graduation, she finally got to meet cousins Stasjha, Jalen, Julius, and Rene, as well as Uncle Jose. They loved her!

9. One thing I've learned: That motherhood is hard, for reasons I never realized. But I'm doing it and will keep on keeping on!

10. My message to Ellie:
Wow sweet girl! Can't believe it's been 6 weeks! You are so beautiful and so sweet to us! We've gotten a bit more used to being parents, and now we know better how good of a baby you are. You are a good eater, a good sleeper, and you give us many sweet smiles when you're awake! I love watching you grow and learn, but I want you to stay my tiny baby forever. Everyone who meets you thinks you're so cute too, and they say that you look a lot like me. Your hair is starting to curl at the ends, especially after your baths. I love you so very much! 

A couple more favorites from these past two weeks:

First-Time Momma

My very first Mother's Day! I've waited all my life to finally be one and now I am. It's incredible, it's overwhelming, it's beautiful... All at the same time. This first Mother's Day will always be a very special one, and Chris and Ellie made sure to make it that way for me too. We slept in, that is after our last feeding, so when I finally did wakeup, I had several texts from sweet friends and family wishing me a happy first Mother's Day! What a great way to start the day! Then Chris made a delicious breakfast while I just held our girl. He gave me two cards, one from him and one from the "kids", where he put not only Eloise's handprint, but Lucy and Dexter's pawprints too! So funny!

First Mother's Day cards - one from my Mom and one from a friend!

Then we just hung out for a bit before we got ready, so that we could go see our moms. We hadn't planned anything with either of them, and I so appreciate them letting me have this first one to be free to spend however I wished, but it just didn't seem right to not see our mommas on Mother's Day.

We then came home and packed up for a picnic under our favorite tree on OU's campus, where we have gone many many times. We brought Miss Lucy too, since she always loves the squirrels! We were excited to find campus almost empty, and our spot open, so we spread out our quilt, unpacked our food, and just enjoyed being with each other. The weather was perfect and the sunlight was beautiful! 

The day ended with shakes from Sonic and baby snuggles on the couch. It was a simple day, but just what I wanted for Mother's Day!

These past five weeks as Eloise's mom have made me think even more about who I am as a person and who I want to be as a mom. It's actually what I think about most of the time, and if I am measuring up to who I want to be. This is probably the hardest thing about motherhood: it is a job that no one notices all that you do and you don't do any one thing excellently. Now don't hear me wrong...Chris tells me everyday how much he appreciates all that I do and helps a lot on the evenings and weekends, but I told him that the hardest part about not teaching anymore would be that i wouldn't get to hear all the encouragement and thanks from others on a day-in and day-out basis. And that's one of the few things I have been right about. Being a mom really tests your self-confidence and self-worth, since its really only you measuring up to your own expectations of what a mom truly is and should be. There is no other comrades in the trenches with you. It's just you. And my expectations of myself, or to do lists, are always much longer than any normal human could accomplish. But I think, "Well if I'm just sitting at home all day, I better get a lot done, since lots of moms do this AND work. If I'm not awesome at this with not working, then I must REALLY not have it together!" Finding balance has been my biggest challenge, and it's an internal one, which means the solution is not easily attained. It has been a battle between what needs to get done and what I have the time/energy to do so. I know that the woman I think I should be really is unattainable but for some reason, I still compare myself to her. And why do I this to myself? And why can't I either be better or get over it? I am not sure why, but one thing I can think to do is look to the women in my life that may not be perfect, but are doing this motherhood thing pretty well. 

First of all, I have been immensely blessed to have two amazing examples of what motherhood is really all about. I've talked of my Grandma Re many times before, but the woman I want to be always goes back to who she was: compassionate, selfless, generous, thoughtful, and fun. She was the quintessential 1950s housewife, and sincere about it in every way. She loved being a homemaker and loved her children. She sacrificed for them day after day so that they would have a good and memorable childhood, no matter whether or not there was enough money do it with. And my own Momma has these same characteristics and reminds me so Grandma Re! In these first weeks of mommahood, if there was anything I need, and sometimes didn't even realize I needed, my sweet Mom was there to give it, whether it be hugs, a listening ear, a delicious treat, or a new outfit for Ellie. Being a mom now makes me realize the kind of hardships she must have had to endure through those early years, but she did so loving me and always making me feel special and "worth it". I now better understand how she loves me too because of how I love Eloise. She is such a wonderful woman and mom to all 5 of us kids. 

I also see these traits in many other beautiful mommas in my life. There is...
...Compassion in the way Roxanne Noles, Brenda Webb, and Heather Caram teach and reach the "unreachables".
...Selflessness in the way both of my sisters, Jennie and Janae, have been moms heroically much longer than myself and have happy children, the way Heather Howard, in the midst of crazy yearbook time, takes the time to check on me and give me gifts, and the way Cheryl Hunt, my "Nebraska Mom", took care of me out of the goodness of her heart, in addition to her four children, when I visited my Dad and he had to work.
...Generosity in the way my mother-in-law, Tess, gives to friends and family in need, the way Joellen Buller gives of her time and energy to me on a regular basis, and the way Sara Purdy is always there to answer my texts full of questions and provide me with much needed advice.
...Thoughtfulness in the way my Aunt Jayne always has a snack or meal for us when we stop by, the way Kendel Hogan or Danielle Basset texts or calls just to check in on me, and the way my Aunt Carol has sent me such fun and sweet gifts over the years.
...Fun in the way Shayna Kutt lets go and spends time with her daughter, the way Shannon Pawley still remembers to be herself and spend time with friends, and the way Heather Caram always manages to make me laugh at the silly things that happen.
...And these admirable qualities are held by even more great women in my life, who will be or are wonderful moms themselves: Elizabeth Hoggatt, Katie Lentz, Celina Quiros, Jamie Rentzel, Jane Purcell, Calypso Gilstrap, Francesca Hunt, Martha Pangburn, Connye Griffin, Loan Vu, Lindsey Grotheer, Emily Deardorf... this list of amazing women could go on and on.

I guess my new goals should focus on being more like these women who have made such a big impact on my life, and not focus on not measuring up to the perfectly organized and fit woman, with a clean house and who never forgets someone's birthday, anniversary, or anything else, but who doesn't really exist. I want to remember to ask for help, to take time for me, and to relish in the moments when I'm holding my sweet girl.

Lastly, I'm so privileged to be Ellie's  momma, and I hope I can make her proud. I want to model for her the self confidence I sometimes lack and be there for her whenever she needs me. I want her to remember when she's big and grown how much fun we had together, not how "together" I seemed to be. I can now see that these are things I want most, even though I might fail at them too. The bottomline today is that I have had such wonderful women influence my life in ways that have made me the woman and momma I am. And who knew the one who would make the most impact would be a little lady named Eloise Marie, who made me a momma the very first time. Happy Mother's Day to the first time mommas like me, the mommas of many years and wisdom, and the ladies that will make great mommas!

Our First Month with Ellie

It's hard to believe it's been a month since I met my beautiful girl! It has flown by but I can't imagine life without her now. And though motherhood is harder than I thought it would be, I still love it because I get to be Eloise's mom. What a sweet girl we have!

 1 Month Old! 

Weight: 9 lbs. 3 oz. 

Length: 23 in

1. Eating? I am nursing her every 3+ hours for about 30 minutes. AND I am so proud that I now have two baggies of pumped milk in the freezer! :) Seems like TMI, but for those nursing mommies, you know what a big accomplishment that is!

2. Sleeping? We haven't had a "bad" night in over a week! Hooray! She sleeps about 3-4 hours at a time, and sometimes a little more if we keep her awake. She does really awesome during the day too with her naps so I can get more stuff done!

3. Milestones? Ellie had her first blowout while getting ready for Prom, as I was saying that she hadn't had any blowouts yet. Silly girl! And though I can't remember where we went for the first time eating out, we have done a lot of it over the past weekends! My tiny girl started wearing some size 0-3 month clothes, which makes me really sad! Slow down little girl!

4. Activities and adventures? Eloise helped setup and attend her very first Prom already! WOW! Chris had to bring her to Norman High Prom, so that I could feed her, and she of course got a lot of attention. We got my car fixed FINALLY which means we can now come and go as we please! More of an awesome thing for me than Ellie, but I am so thankful for that freedom now! Ellie got to meet my Dad, Grandpa Larry, for the very first time, and seeing him hold her was so sweet! 

5. Favorite baby item this week? We love her Chicco mini stroller! It is more compact and much easier to manage. It seems silly, but I really love it and can get it out with just one hand. YAY!

6. Favorite moment this week? Ellie finally meeting my Dad, Grandpa Larry! 

7. Looking forward to this week? I always look forward to the weekends with my family to just be together. 

8. Visitors?: Emily & Joel came over and brought us dinner, and they ate with us too. They have met her before, but it was so sweet for them to bring food. Francesca visited a few evenings too, and cooked us dinner as well! And of course, the newest person to meet Ellie is her Grandpa Larry, who thinks she is beautiful! 

9. One thing I've learned: That I can't get nearly as much done each day that I think I can! Learning to be okay with that too!

10. My message to Ellie:

WOW! My sweet girl is already a month old! These first weeks together have been more than imagined: more tiring, more beautiful, more overwhelming, and more wonderful. I love you so much and am so happy that I get to be your momma. There is so much I love about you, and each thing I hope I can remember as you grow. I love your play-doh ears, your tiny dinosaur cries, your long toes, all your dark hair, your expressive hands, your big gray blue eyes, your furry shoulders and back, and your beautiful olive skin. Your sweet smiles make all the hard stuff not matter anymore! I don't want you to grow up, but can't wait to see what comes next!

Here are some of our favorites from these past two weeks...